Suzy, a beautiful young woman, has been moved by the church after one moving sermon, and she has decided that she does not want eternal punishment for her wrongs (the few that they are) and has decided to pick up her Bible and start reading.
But where to begin? Well how about from the beginning? She opens the perfectly well kept book from her living room coffee table, wipes the few inches of dust from the top, sneezes a couple successive times, and opens it to the first page.
"Genesis 1:1, In the beginning God created the Heavens and the earth."
Now wait a second...that can't be right, leading scientists have proven that the earth was formed by an accident. Aw well, she'll just brim over that. After all, God could have given the Big Bang a little nudge. She continues reading, and after a few more verses realizes how wrong this book is. It didn't take a handful of days to create the earth! It took millions of years...The Bible must have forgotten something! Clearly none of this can't be true! Monkeys weren't made on the sixth day and then man a day later! Everyone knows monkeys share 98% of their DNA with us.
Frustrated, she turns randomly to the end of the Bible, to the New Testament.
"1 Timothy 6:10; For the love of money is the root of all evil."
Now granted money can go to some peoples' heads, but money is good, it gives us food, and clean clothes, a warm house (and Comcar cable at the low price of $29.99 a month.)
"Matt 5:21-22, You have heard that it was said to an older generation, ‘Do not murder,’ and ‘whoever murders will be subjected to judgment.’ But I say to you that anyone who is angry with a brother will be subjected to judgment. And whoever insults a brother will be brought before the council, and whoever says ‘Fool’ will be sent to fiery Hell"
That's a little harsh! Surely everyone gets mad. Goodness! Even Jesus got mad (somewhere) and he certainly didn't go to Hell. This Bible is clearly contradicting itself.
"Rom. 1:26-28; For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural,and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error. And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper."
What!? But Suzy best friend Johanna is a lesbian! God clearly cannot mean that it is wrong! The people who wrote this must not have really known who God is. Oh, but Suzy knows. God is tolerant.
Ah, this looks better: 2 Corinthians 9:8, "And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work."
THAT'S the God she knows.
So many things can be said about this situation, and though fictional (the girl's name was actually Sherly) it is far too near the truth for the age that we live in in America today. It could be argued very easily the things Suzy believed were wrong. But ultimately, I want to focus on one main thing from this: Suzianity.
Suzy has decided which parts of the Bible she agrees with and those she doesn't, by the time she has taken her doctrine, it is no longer the word of God, it is the word of Suzy. She is not following Christ and therefore not a Christian, she's a Suzianitan.
Take this statement for example on a critique for the 2012 Avengers movie, (it is an entirely made up criticism and reflects no true personal opinions by the author, it is merely for rhetorical purposes): "Iron man (Robert Downey Jr.) played what is possibly the most...amazingly unbelievable character of his career. Gwyneth Paltrow, on the other hand...played a remarkably...pretty...character."
The real text reads: "Iron man (Robert Downey Jr.) played what is possibly the most lackluster and amazingly unbelievable character of his career. Gwyneth Paltrow, on the other hand, when overlooking her atrocious outfits, played a remarkably small, but pretty faced character."
What happened here is that someone took out bits an pieces from the true text and turned it into something else entirely. Someone decided they disagreed with certain words in the description of Mr. Jr's character and made them "truth."
This is EXACTLY what MANY MANY Americans do today. They take bits and pieces of the Bible but disprove others. This turns it into something else that is no longer the Bible. You can no longer be called Christians if you do this because you do not believe the sword of the spirit, source for truth, God's word itself. Remember, narrow is the path to righteousness (Matt 7:14.) Do you think it's really that easy? You can just pick and choose which parts you believe in? That's what most people do! If you're doing what most people do, then you probably read the verse, "The path to righteousness...is wide." You would be mistaken.
Christians are certainly guilty of this as well. If not mostly. I once met a fellow believer who said to me, "Well I believe that when God created the earth in seven days, they were not literal, they were theoretical." *Buzzer sound* Wrong! If God said historically seven days, He clearly meant seven days. God can count! Saying such things like this open doors for others to say things like, "Moses didn't really part the Red Sea, obviously God provided them with a fleet of steamers that they didn't understand the mechanics of so they called it parting of the Red Sea."
When you read the Bible, you have to read it literally, not "God meant this," that insinuates that God doesn't know how to articulate Himself. Now I don't want to hear any, "How can we take Revelation or Daniel literally?" Those are a different category of Bible altogether. It would be considered prophetic, not historic or literal parts such as commandments.
I'm not saying that when other members of the Church disagree on certain things (for instance baptism) makes it unchristian. There is a difference between trying to discern something that is not clearly put in the word of God (or rather unspecified for a reason) and changing what is clearly meant.
In other words, choosing what you agree with in the Bible turns Christianity into
____________ianity. And _________ianity, does NOT get one to Heaven, and you become a servant
^Insert name ^Insert name
not of God, but of self, which is the absolute opposite of what God wants.
Oh, and by the way, the human DNA is also 55% to that of a bannana. So if we came from monkeys, and monkeys came from bananas....OH MY GOODNESS! We're cannibals!
But where to begin? Well how about from the beginning? She opens the perfectly well kept book from her living room coffee table, wipes the few inches of dust from the top, sneezes a couple successive times, and opens it to the first page.
"Genesis 1:1, In the beginning God created the Heavens and the earth."
Now wait a second...that can't be right, leading scientists have proven that the earth was formed by an accident. Aw well, she'll just brim over that. After all, God could have given the Big Bang a little nudge. She continues reading, and after a few more verses realizes how wrong this book is. It didn't take a handful of days to create the earth! It took millions of years...The Bible must have forgotten something! Clearly none of this can't be true! Monkeys weren't made on the sixth day and then man a day later! Everyone knows monkeys share 98% of their DNA with us.
Frustrated, she turns randomly to the end of the Bible, to the New Testament.
"1 Timothy 6:10; For the love of money is the root of all evil."
Now granted money can go to some peoples' heads, but money is good, it gives us food, and clean clothes, a warm house (and Comcar cable at the low price of $29.99 a month.)
"Matt 5:21-22, You have heard that it was said to an older generation, ‘Do not murder,’ and ‘whoever murders will be subjected to judgment.’ But I say to you that anyone who is angry with a brother will be subjected to judgment. And whoever insults a brother will be brought before the council, and whoever says ‘Fool’ will be sent to fiery Hell"
That's a little harsh! Surely everyone gets mad. Goodness! Even Jesus got mad (somewhere) and he certainly didn't go to Hell. This Bible is clearly contradicting itself.
"Rom. 1:26-28; For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural,and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error. And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper."
What!? But Suzy best friend Johanna is a lesbian! God clearly cannot mean that it is wrong! The people who wrote this must not have really known who God is. Oh, but Suzy knows. God is tolerant.
Ah, this looks better: 2 Corinthians 9:8, "And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work."
THAT'S the God she knows.
So many things can be said about this situation, and though fictional (the girl's name was actually Sherly) it is far too near the truth for the age that we live in in America today. It could be argued very easily the things Suzy believed were wrong. But ultimately, I want to focus on one main thing from this: Suzianity.
Suzy has decided which parts of the Bible she agrees with and those she doesn't, by the time she has taken her doctrine, it is no longer the word of God, it is the word of Suzy. She is not following Christ and therefore not a Christian, she's a Suzianitan.
Take this statement for example on a critique for the 2012 Avengers movie, (it is an entirely made up criticism and reflects no true personal opinions by the author, it is merely for rhetorical purposes): "Iron man (Robert Downey Jr.) played what is possibly the most...amazingly unbelievable character of his career. Gwyneth Paltrow, on the other hand...played a remarkably...pretty...character."
The real text reads: "Iron man (Robert Downey Jr.) played what is possibly the most lackluster and amazingly unbelievable character of his career. Gwyneth Paltrow, on the other hand, when overlooking her atrocious outfits, played a remarkably small, but pretty faced character."
What happened here is that someone took out bits an pieces from the true text and turned it into something else entirely. Someone decided they disagreed with certain words in the description of Mr. Jr's character and made them "truth."
This is EXACTLY what MANY MANY Americans do today. They take bits and pieces of the Bible but disprove others. This turns it into something else that is no longer the Bible. You can no longer be called Christians if you do this because you do not believe the sword of the spirit, source for truth, God's word itself. Remember, narrow is the path to righteousness (Matt 7:14.) Do you think it's really that easy? You can just pick and choose which parts you believe in? That's what most people do! If you're doing what most people do, then you probably read the verse, "The path to righteousness...is wide." You would be mistaken.
Christians are certainly guilty of this as well. If not mostly. I once met a fellow believer who said to me, "Well I believe that when God created the earth in seven days, they were not literal, they were theoretical." *Buzzer sound* Wrong! If God said historically seven days, He clearly meant seven days. God can count! Saying such things like this open doors for others to say things like, "Moses didn't really part the Red Sea, obviously God provided them with a fleet of steamers that they didn't understand the mechanics of so they called it parting of the Red Sea."
When you read the Bible, you have to read it literally, not "God meant this," that insinuates that God doesn't know how to articulate Himself. Now I don't want to hear any, "How can we take Revelation or Daniel literally?" Those are a different category of Bible altogether. It would be considered prophetic, not historic or literal parts such as commandments.
I'm not saying that when other members of the Church disagree on certain things (for instance baptism) makes it unchristian. There is a difference between trying to discern something that is not clearly put in the word of God (or rather unspecified for a reason) and changing what is clearly meant.
In other words, choosing what you agree with in the Bible turns Christianity into
____________ianity. And _________ianity, does NOT get one to Heaven, and you become a servant
^Insert name ^Insert name
not of God, but of self, which is the absolute opposite of what God wants.
Oh, and by the way, the human DNA is also 55% to that of a bannana. So if we came from monkeys, and monkeys came from bananas....OH MY GOODNESS! We're cannibals!
My son built a car and a house out of legos, and I found that they shared 85% of the same types of legos! The lego house must have evolved from the lego car, since they're made of the same bulding blocks! :)
ReplyDeleteSeriously, though, this is a great blog post, Lexi. A lot of Christians need to take these lessons to heart. It's amazing how many things are controversial in the Church today that should simply be obvious for Christians who read their Bibles.
Canninals.....I love it! Hey, I wonder how much DNA you share with your favorite Auntie? Must be MORE than 98%. That makes me.......brilliant ;-)
ReplyDeleteThen again, I ended a statement with a question mark. Perhaps I'm swimming at the shallow end of the gene pool.
DeleteAnyone who quotes the Lion King (whether intentional or non) is brilliant in my book;)
Delete