The Short Person Chronicles: Costco edition

      That's me there on the right. Well, not literally, hmmm...has too boyish hair. And looks a bit too boyish. I know! Picture it female, and with long flowing locks like this:

    Ahhh, that's better.
  Anyways, that's me on the right, and my gorgeous, tall sister is on the left. Did I mention she was my YOUNGER SISTER!? I have to tell you, there is nothing that hurts a competetive older sibling's pride than the day when their youger siblings outgrow them. Then a whole bunch of issues begin to form, and people begin to give your right  to the title "oldest" to your younger sibling.
      Another thing that doesn't make sense, is that almost every older sibling is out-grown by their younger, and yet they always assume the shortest are younger. I'll be talking to someone and they'll be like, "And you're the youngest right?" And I'd reply with a sigh, "No, I am actually older." Then they would say, "Wow! I could have sworn you were younger," and with the same breath they'd continue, "Yeah, my younger sister is taller than me too." Has the world lost all of its deductive abilities!? If most every shorter sibling is older, than why on earth do they always assume they are younger? What is possibly worse, is how calmly your younger sibling will stand there letting them offend you like that.
    Anyways, my worst experience ever, happened when I was about thirteen years old. For any of you who don't know what Costco is, here's the gist: A wholesale store where things are sometimes cheaper, sometimes not. They give food samples like crazy, and as of lately, with all those people out there with allergies (thanks a lot) they have made it so that six year olds can't grab samples without their parent. As I was saying, I was about thirteen, and I decided those brownie samples looked mighty tasty. And me, being the patient being I am, fast walked (very fast,) to the stand. I reached out and took one, uttered a quick, "thank you," and then the lady basically ripped the sample out of my hand.
   Then she said, "Where's your mom?"
   I was utterly speachless, and apparently, when I'm speechless, I have a very convincing guilty look.
   The lady rolled her eyes and said, "Sorry," (she so was not sorry) "I can't give you a sample without your mom." As she said this, my eleven year old sister walked up, took one, and walked right back to my mom without so much as a glance from the Costco lady.
    First of all, I may have been young, but I'd think by age six I would know my allergies. I have a cousin who knew very well by the time she was three what she could and couldn't have. But I mean COME ON! THIRTEEN! Why do people always hate on the shorter folks? This is discrimination, and I want to seek justice. I'll bet that lady was shorter than her younger sister as well.
  And in the end, if I was a six year old, and I did have an allergic reaction, the only thing they'd have to worry about would be our suing them for half a gazillion dollars...

Lucretius: On the Nature of Things

     Who here loves Philosophical works? *crickets* No Aristotle fans in here? Weird. Okay then. who likes science? *a couple of hands halfway in the air, obviously these people don't know what they like* All right...Well then, who likes poetry? *about the same response* Okay then.  What could ever be better then, than combining them all into one Philosophical view of science written poetically? YAAAAY!
   Not yay. This was quite possibly the most boring book I've ever read. Lucretius was obviously one of those homeschool nerds, whose siblings were his only friends and whose mom locked him in a room his whole life. "Poetry is fun," Yeah, riiight.
   This is the kind of book you DON'T read, and let other people tell you their reviews on it, and you have faith and take their word for it. So, to save you the pain, I will give you the jest of it.
   Basically, it's the evolutionary theory. Have you ever heard and evolutionist say, "Lithen to these Creationisthts, they thound thooo old fathion." *attempt at nerd accent* Well, Dawinists, take a look back, like 2000 years back, and there's the REAL birth of your theory. 99 B.C. to be exact. (And don't even try to say, "It's B.C.E," otherwise I will hunt down, tranquilize you, and you will wake up in the Yak portion of a zoo.)
   It isn't until book IV where things start to get slightly amusing.
   Anyways, Lucretius was pretty off on a lot of what he said, but come to think of it, so are evolutionists. (If you want reasons why evolutionists are, you'll have to comment, then I'll give you answers:P) For one, he says things along the lines of, "Sight is just a pile of atoms, that disperse from the mother of the atoms (i.e. atoms from a couch) and they hit the films of your eyes at just the right time allowing you to see." "Your soul is actually composed of a bunch of atoms, so when you die, it dies as well because it is matter, it can in fact be killed."
  But, he does say there was this big storm of atoms at the beginning of time, which eventually collided and made stars, the sun, the moon, and eventually earth. Earth eventually managed to get in the perfect spot from everything and life forms began to be created. He says people without eyes were some of the first and some missing limbs, some that were half horse, and then, they eventually found fire and magically became normal humans. Sound familiar? Well yes, a half horse is a centaur, but I was more referring to his entire theory. Evolution! The only reason Darwin is credited with founding it is because Lucretius was considered a philosopher. He had no means of trying to find out if any of this was true. It was all speculation.
   One thing he does differ extremely from most philosophers of his day, is that he believes we really have no purpose in life. Aristotle, Plato, and Socrates all believed we were to be virtuous and seek out goodness. But Lucretius believes we got here on accident, we are just a bunch of atoms and chemical reactions, so we have no purpose.
   It's no wonder kids in school today are depressed! They are taught the have no purpose in school. Says principal to drug addicted student, "Oh yeah, you need to be good, but only because we said so, you don't get anything out of it or anything. Cops just don't like it and they're bigger than you and have guns so, you're out of luck."
   Seriously, why on earth do atheists and evolutions believe we need to do good?  Why not keep all your money for yourself? You earned it. Why give it to charities when you are going to disperse into nothingness in the end anyways?
   Next time one of these people tells you they're an evolutionist or atheist, you can say, "Oh, so you believe we don't have a purpose then?" They will try to argue, but you can just reply, "But according to your beliefs, we are just a bunch of chemical reactions. To quote along the lines of a very wise person 'thought and bowel movements have both the same meaning.'" See what they have to say. If they do have something to say, it's simply because they don't want to listen.
  Other than these few things, Lucretius offers very little. But remember: Next time you're doing your science homework and complaining, imagine having to do it in POETRY! Then maybe you'll be a little happier.

Fun with Poetry

Here's a game: Spell things out, like "Hi," while annotating the letter and using famous poetry. Start with the first letter and see which line has it, write it down. Your next line will contain the next letter/line etc. A letter equals a line, a word equals a stanza. NO backtracking! I find it makes less sense when you go backwards. Also, avoid using words that contain letters like, "X" or "Z." Also, short poems typically don't work, as they are too short to find anything. Try things like Sir Gawain and the Green Knight or the Iliad. See if it makes sense and/or sounds awesome! I will use something from Lucretius's On the Nature of Things for my example

How eld withdraws each object at the end,
Entangled and enmassed, whereby at once
Lest humankind should perish.  When they feign
Like drops of rain, through the unbottomed void;
Or through thin air, must quicken their descent.

How often to thy bosom flings his streangth
O'ermastered by the eternal wound of love--
With thought untroubled, nor mid such event.

A Greek it was who first opposing dared
Raise mortal eyes that terror to withstand
Each in the end when each is overthrown.

Yet Ennius too in everlasting verse
Old Homer's ghost to him and shed salt tears
Until we seem to mark and hear at hand


Doesn't that sound purely awesome? Anyways, I said, "Hello how are you?"  Feel free to put your own creative ones in the comment box:)

What is Beauty?

  
   A big problem amongst women is their complete misunderstanding of beauty. They look to others to define what beauty is. And that beauty is almost entirely unattainable. Now I typically try to avoid being cliche, but in cases like this, it is very hard not to be. So I will try to approach this from a semi-new perspective that is different from what the culture says about what makes you beautiful. Before giving the biblical reasons behind it, I want to start with an analysis of the culture.
    In the media, we are constantly bombarded with photos of beautiful women. Whether it's in line at the grocery store, surfing the web, or on TV, all of them appear unbelievably gorgeous. Now, not only is it true that the majority (if not all) of these are air brushed to look unbelievably gorgeous.But they have an advantage: they can afford the health foods without hormones, expensive trainers and such.
    Us everyday Janes, have trouble paying for regular food with tons of added hormones (weight gaining by the way) and sugars. These are cheaper, and we still have trouble paying for those things on top of bills. We also are not paid to work out. Think about it: people get in movies and are paid large sums of money to work out to look gorgeous in their close ups. So this in turn makes it significantly harder for us to stay skinny. My solution was going vegan, cutting out those hormones and cholesterol anyway. But for people whose parents are opposed to that, it can be very hard to make such decisions, especially if they make you the dinners and no one will do it with you.
  On top of it, movies like Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, and Beauty and the Beast, both emphasize how important your individual "inner" beauty is, opposed to other people. But they do so using insanely gorgeous people, which in turn makes you feel worse. Because you are not half as beautiful as them, and they're worried, you're in big trouble.
   Let's Play a little game called: Spot the Differences:

 As you can see from the picture, Ms. Diaz appears TOO skinny, but yet...despite bone show, they manage to make her look even skinnier. Hey? Who needs that bone anyway? It just holds up your body. You can do the rest of the game by yourself.
   Now,we've all at least heard of Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty and love. Well, let's take a look at a piece of art that shows this most beautiful of women, shall we? Warning, censor zone.

Now, I'm not sure which is which, so just take a look at them all (this is by Peter Paul, made in about 1635-1637.)  Is this quite what you would expect from the goddess of beauty? Well, the time period from which it came, was a time of poverty and monarchs. Beauty, was actually considered woman who were the fattest amongst them. It meant they were wealthy enough to afford a lot of twinkies (yes believe it or not, they were expensive then.) They were also most beautiful with rotten teeth, because it meant they could have tons of sugar. When all their teeth fell out, and they realized how much harder it was to wolf down a steak, what better answer than to rip out the teeth of peasants and use for themselves?
   I have also heard from some people (I have not had time to double check this information, but I do trust the source) that there is (was?) a TV show that showed African women, being shipped off by their parents (in today's time) to go to fattening camps. They were fed high calorie foods explicitly to cause them to gain weight. In interviews, they would say, "Look at my beautiful stretch marks."
   Starting to notice a trend here? Well, if not, here it is: Culture defines what beauty is does it not? And what does that beauty seem to be? Whatever is the hardest to attain! Women in the 1600's had a hard time affording food of any kind and were always skinny. In Africa, people die from starvation regularly, and yet beautiful is the 400 lb woman. Today in America, it is the opposite. Impossibly skinny is beautiful. This causes woman (young and old.)
    Psalm 139:14 says, "I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well." It is also said in Genesis 9:6, "“Whoever sheds man’s blood, By man his blood shall be shed; For in the image of God He made man." 1 Corinthians 6:19 says, "Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?" So you can see from this, that you are made in the image of God, and God is kinda perfect in every way. When you look at your body and are filled with sadness because of it, God in turn is sad because you don't find HIM efficiently beautiful.
  It says that you are not your own as his temple and that you are His. So why on earth would you keep hurting yourself by making you lose weight? You damage the temple of GOD! The creator of the universe. Picture this okay: look at where you are and zoom out to the outside of the building you are in. Zoom out further to see the street, keep zooming until you see the area code. Keep going until you see the city, and then the state, and then the country, continent and then world. If that isn't enough zoom out further, past the moon and Mars and Saturn and past the dwarf planet Pluto. You are now towards the edge of the Milky Way (no, not the candy bar.) That is only one a a billion galxies! Now look at yourself from that spot. God has all of this in his hands, He's got the whole universe and beyooond in His hands. You seem pretty insignificant now huh? The fact that God gives a single ounce of recognition towards you is amazing. He goes beyond that! He not only recognizes, but loves you. And you are hurting His dwelling place every time you make an unheathy decision for your body. Whether it be eating too much junk food, or too little food in general.
  When you do this, you are spitting in the face of the man who died for your life. Saying He didn't do a good enough job so you don't care or you're going to fix perfection. He TELLS you explicitly that you are wonderful! That's amazing!
  All this is to say, the culture WANTS beauty to be unattainable. Doctors make millions every year just on anorexics. Make up lines, and clothing and work out commercials are getting exactly what they want out of you: money. It all relates back to selfishness in the end. You are being selfish for thinking you're not good enough, and the media makes millions off their beauty products and the next "Sure to get you to lose 30 lb" diets. And GOD is the always the one who gets hurt, and He never did anything to hurt you.
  What might I say is the cure to this? Be healthy! Don't be afraid to have your stomach show slightly when you where a tang-top. I cut out meat and dairy, because there is so much junk in all of it (organic or not) that it was just beyond ridiculous. It was hard yeah, I LOVE meat, but I wanted to live long and be healthy. I didn't lose weight, but my body looked healthier. I no longer have an acne "problem" (quotes because I still get a zit now and then, but not all over my face acne) and my body just felt and appeared healthier.
    So next time you think you're not good enough look wise, think about this: Is this what the culture wants me to think? Think about Aphrodite and how much prettier you are in comparison to her;) And also, remember that the only one you will ever be completely good enough for will appreciate your decision.

The Disney Princesses, part 1

By Disney Princesses, I mean the REAL ones, ones featured on the princess posters until the previous two years (so minus the Princess and the frog girl, and minus Rapunzel.)
Now, I reflect on stuff through most of the night, and one of those things happened to be the princesses Disney presents to us. Girls love them, and I'll admit, as I've gotten older, I've grown a bit more fond of them as well. I was always a Powerpuff girl...girl. My sister on the other hand had to have her princess Aurora dress pried from her fingers at the age of about eleven. So you might say we're fans. But is that even a good idea? Should children really imitate these people? Sure these princesses seem innocent enough, but when you look at what's really there, you'll be surprised what you might find.

1. Ariel (a.k.a The Little Mermaid)
    Though she is called the "little" mermaid, Ariel quite swiftly into the story reveals to her father that she is quite grown up and is capable of making her own decisions. After all, she is sixteen years old. She deserves to have a later curfew, and her daddy must llearn to trust her. *Buzzer noise* Wrong. While that may be an acceptable argument, (my mom was very resonable when I turned sixteen and asked for and 8:30 pm curfew over my more recent 7 pm) this is not what little, sixteen year old Ariel desires. No, she has fallen in love with a human being, and daddy is all but reluctant to let that go on.
    Though I do have to question Triton's parenting tecniques and resoning. Set aside that she's sixteen years old, she wants to marry into a different species, that alledgedly do bad things to them (never quite clear what.) I honestly know nothing of this *pours mermaid stew down garbage disposal* He also finds out that despite his yelling at her, which I think happens with a little less persuasion than is necessary, she is still secretly collecting human utensils. OH NO! Now they'll have perfectly and affectively combed hair! So he tears the place down and, you guessed it, yells at her (you'd think she's be used to it by now...)
   Well...looks like she's kind of out of luck, after all, you can tell respecting her parent's wishes are her #1 Highest priority. Guess she'll just have to marry one of the perfect, model mermen. Nope! What she really figures is, "what better to do than sell my soul to a demon? I'm sure I'll get what I want this way!"
   ...Is this going quite how you would expect a story that little girls imitate to go? First thing rebellion. Of course she had her reasons. If I fell in love with a goat and my father told me that wasn't happening, what better thing to do than resort to what "my heart tells me."
   Well, after she finds the prince (how old is he?), rescues him from the sea demon, and restores herself to normal, you'd expect her to go home and be locked up for a while. But no, daddy has other ideas. Now, I don't know whether it was being turned into seaweed that caused his mind to be a bit jumbled, or the fact that he was another species, but he somehow decided that "Hey, who cares if she almost caused the entire world to come into ruin for giving ultimate power to the devil? Look at the way she stalks that young man (seriously...like 30 years old?) she really does love him. You know what!? I have a great fatherly idea! I'll turn her into a human (we know how well that went last time) and she can be happy now!

   Morals in this story: Rebellion, even though there will be some rough spots, will in the end, get you exactly what you want. Age is of no consequence when you are in love. Crabs can sing really great song numbers.

   So what do you think? Is this acceptable for children to imitate? It's up to you, but don't let them wear those Ariel outfits  for Halloween if you're not going to want them to take it the whole nine yards:P

   Quick note: This was made entirely for jesting purposes, my sister turned out fine, and Sleeping Beauty was messed up too. If you want more, comment:) I can discuss them all:) I hope you liked this, and just an FYI, I looove these movies, so I bear no ill will

Beautiful Music in unexpected places

Recently, I have been big into symphonies and such. You know what I've found? Not all good ones are necessarily Tchaikovsky  or Beethoven. In fact, a lot of great music can be found in movies or (forgive me) even some video games. It's almost sad, how few people will recongnise good music because of where it comes from. Now don't get me wrong, there are certain places music comes from that I refuse to listen to (such as Harry Potter soundtracks.) That's found where anyone feels comfortable drawing the line. But seriously, when there is good music in say, Animal Crossing (not true, nastolgic maybe, but not beautiful by any means. Humor my example.) Good game, popular, but because it's in a video game where people talk to animals and fish and basically do everything boring in life we miss out on (-the talking to animals, that's pretty awesome) people tend to over look the music. When they listen to it, they are afraid of saying the music is good because of where it comes from.
To get the ball rolling, I've decided to include a few of my favorite peices from unexpected places:) Overcome the intimadation! Because it's from you tube, don't expect highest quality...

Okay, so go onto youtube right now and google this entire scene! It is so sweet.

^Oh yeah, from a video game

<-I even included the whole story for this one...though I can still make nothing sensical out of it...

<EXTREMELY powerful piece.

<Beautiful

One more

Sorry, I couldn't resist:)

Prefict Bloogs

Hvea u evar knowtissed how peepol's blogs nvever seeeem ta have error? Wlle tis is to proove that rong! Hear's ta beeng humen and hving shurt, impurfict blogs!

CAT VID!!!

just ta keep things random once in a while.;)